In the next two weeks, we’re going to six graduation ceremonies and parties. During a dozen years on Bernie’s arm attending black tie dinners honoring future surgeons, I have listened to 192 speeches. I counted. The amount of time these residents donate to difficult training– and what they sacrifice to do it–allows them the honor and privilege of saying whatever the hell they want up at the podium. But that doesn’t mean I might not poke fun of them. Just a little. Congratulations, graduates.
Graduation season is upon us, friends. And it’s all an honor and a privilege! It would have been impossible without your support on the road less traveled. It’s also a lot like swimming with sharks, but Mark Twain probably said something about it best. As a kid I dissected woodland creatures and took apart the toaster! Everyone or no one in my family is a doctor, but most of us have inspiring, dead relatives. I’m from far away (NOT a Red Sox fan, hahahahaha!) or from right here (Whoo hoo! Go, Sawx!) and when I started training something embarrassing or horrible happened. And then incredible and wonderful things happened. And it was all an honor and a privilege to have worked with you, the best people I have ever known, though the sum total of our future friendships will be Facebook “likes.”
The rotation where I was finally treated with a modicum of respect, performed with reasonable proficiency, or the one with the least amount of call inspired me get a job doing that. Or, I’m really excited about my cardiothoracic surgery fellowship and the next paragraph is testimony to the man-crushable cowboy heroes of the operating room. I bet none of us will miss these horrible winters, huh? Hahahahahahaha!
Props to my current/future husband/wife/partner. We made it, honey, but we’re still broke. After a near decade of training there’s only, like, a few more years on the futon. I might get a little teary thanking you–maybe I’ll grab the baby for this part– as inspiration to the junior residents, and to prove I’m not always a condescending, work-dumping asshole. Look guys, they can’t stop the clock!
Michael Ellis DeBakey–or maybe Twain again– said something apt to this moment. I’ll never forget my training here at the World’s Best Hospital with the most Talented Surgeons in the Universe, unless my fellowship institution is a trade up and then you’ll only see me in their caps and sweatshirts. But I can’t wait to reconnect with you again as collaborators on research projects in this exciting field. Until I go into private practice… then please “like” my Facebook page.
As the person who wrote all of my recommendations always says, “blah blah hard work blah blah fun!” Thanks to grandma-on-oxygen or cousin-from-Hawaii for making the trip… and for this awesome chicken-or-fish dinner. It’s all been an honor and a privilege!
Is anyone validating the parking?
*wild applause while edging into the aisle to beat the rush for the buffet*
Thanks, Nutty! I guess you’ve been to your share of these…
When I attended the graduation ceremony for my oldest kid, the speaker started off with “None of you will remember a single thing I say here” (or words to that effect) and he was right.
That’s an excellent opener. Points are awarded (by me) for brevity, too.
I love how different all our worlds can be. I would not have known any of the words in the almost 200 speeches you attended… except maybe Doctor! I just got a text from a Mom about her preschooler’s potty training. And came from an upright citizen’s brigade class where we were talking about a guy who lost his ID, then re-bought it for $10 only to find out it only saves you $5 at the shows, so it was not a good investment. But the speaker at his daughter’s graduation was Bob Newhart.
I love your wackadoodle world of singers and writers and celebrities and awesome-all-the-time weather.
I wish it would rain. AND I love the word WACKADOODLE!
This is F-ing hilarious Britt. Enjoy the parties.
We will. Six parties… all with the same people. I’m going to Bloomingdales.
Miss you, 10x!
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