I’m safely enthroned on my comfy bed surrounded by love, doting relatives, and a ridiculous number of pillows. Brodie had many gentle hugs for me, and Teddy just wanted to know if “they did that boob thing already?” I had been dreading this day most of all, and yet the overwhelming feeling this morning was relief. I woke up to Grace. It can only be through all of your support and prayer that I was able to see the truth: the cancer was removed, I’m still ME, and artfully mussed short hair bedhead can be kind of cute.

There is still a long road ahead of healing and chemotherapy that I’d like to tackle without entirely relinquishing my favorite jobs as Wife and Mom. But right now I’m going to enjoy being utterly lazy. Frankly, you don’t want to mess with Paige’s system once she’s gotten it into place. In less than one week, Zealot Sister has my boys clearing their own dishes and consistently saying bedtime prayers. I might even get a “yes ma’am” out of them before she leaves (sadly, in two days).

Many of you have asked, and my honest answer is that I’m not ready for visitors. My only job right now is to heal, take drugs, and have not so cute bedhead. But I did want to type it because it is true: I’M OK! I heard this message in prayer many times, but didn’t really believe it until I was out of the operating room last night. Even this morning, as a team of residents barged in to stare at my (improved!) body in an unflattering gown and harsh light, that feeling remained. And now I can see it reflected in the eyes of my family, these little boys, and my handsome-prince-charmy husband. I asked for love and prayer, and all of you delivered. I asked for courage, and I have it in spades. I mentioned flowers, and have half of Winston’s inventory. Never has my house been so full of love and blooms.

I’m the luckiest girl in the world. Good night, friends.

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